Worst thing you've been awakened to???

[Dawico]

I woke up in the back seat to the truck swerving all over the road. My cousin swerved to miss a rabbit.

Yes, he is an idiot.

 

[PhulesAu]

a thousand pounds of Kodiak bear shredding the tent. I put 10 rounds of 41 mag into that bitch before she quit moving. God Bless S&W.

 

[Davetex]

That's not funny, and you are an asshole. Someone should kick you directly in your butthole, so that it hurts for days.

I'm voting for hutu for president.

 

[Vaquero]

Laying in a tub full of ice.
In a sleazy motel room.
One kidney missing.
A taunting message on the mirror.
Written in lipstick.

 

[grasshopperglock]

Lol, did it have a phone number in the message?

I'd call her back.

 

[ed308]

Man thats bad. Not sure I could handle that one.
Worst for me, waking up to an ugly woman after a night out at the bar. But those days are long gone.

 

[HKShooter65]

Laying in a tub full of ice.
In a sleazy motel room.
One kidney missing.
A taunting message on the mirror.
Written in lipstick.

OP back at you guys.

Life is quieter without the moribund feline.
So many of fellow posters' interesting life experienced weighing in here!

Will Rogers, afterlife bound, quipped he wants to go where the dogs go.
Fine, as I'll have no cats there!!

Spent the day in front of a jury for a few hours.
Lawyers are just playing a high stakes poker game at my anxiety-riddled expense.

G'nite again.
Off to the hot tub with 3 fingers of single malt.

Final answer: Life is good. Long. Rich. Fascinating. Good.

HKS

 

[CZPistol]

Will Rogers, afterlife bound, quipped he wants to go where the dogs go.

Check ZX9RCAM's signature line...

 

[zincwarrior]

OP back at you guys.

Life is quieter without the moribund feline.
So many of fellow posters' interesting life experienced weighing in here!

Will Rogers, afterlife bound, quipped he wants to go where the dogs go.
Fine, as I'll have no cats there!!

Spent the day in front of a jury for a few hours.
Lawyers are just playing a high stakes poker game at my anxiety-riddled expense.

G'nite again.
Off to the hot tub with 3 fingers of single malt.

Final answer: Life is good. Long. Rich. Fascinating. Good.

HKS

TBone, lord of all wiener dogs will welcome Roger to his pad by the lake. They can hunt bugs and go after squirrels. ROger can flank em from the top and TBone and keep em treed.

 

[Bozz10mm]

It was about 30 years ago. Around midnight, my teenage son comes through the bedroom door and whispers loudly, "Dad, Dad, there's a man running around the house". Holy crap. I grabbed my S&W 39-2. I was really concerned about my 8 year old daughter and I was heading to her room while asking my Son which room he had seen the man in. He said, "No, he's running around outside the house." Kind of a relief.

I cautiously looked out through the living room window. Just as I did, the guys face appears right in front of mine. No, it wasn't my reflection, unless I'm a tall, shaved headed, black man. Scared the crap out of me and him too. He took off running. I called the police and gave them a description. A few minutes later there was a couple of squad cars spot lighting through the neighborhood. They never did come to the house.

 

[robertc1024]

I was in college, living in a uber-crappy apartment on the ground floor. I was sleeping late one morning and heard a crash. It sort of woke me up, then I heard some more noise and got up. I stuck my head around the corner and some dude was breaking out the kitchen window and trying to get in. He looked more scared than I was and ran off. Called the police etc. I probably should have invited him in for some ramen or something - I sure as hell didn't have anything worth stealing.

 

[Mexican_Hippie]

I actually agree with you there. I read that this morning and was wondering what the hell compelled me to post that. My apologies to the OP.

I'm cleaning it up.


Also, if someone has a problem with a post report it. Attacking other forum members will not be tolerated.

If you're a new guy go introduce yourself in the Intros forum.

 

[Rebel]

Can't think of a worst one, so here are a couplea amusing ones.

At a reenactment, I set my tent up in front of a tree. I woke up to the sound of water being poured out of a container. It was not uncommon for guys to have a plastic bedpan/piss bottle at reenactments (it can get cold out there). I commented something to the effect of "If I feel a puddle underneath my head, I will shoot you."

Another reenactment, woke up in the middle of the night, mostly because I passed out face-first in a field. It was around freezing, as I recall. Yes, alcohol was involved. Bless those bachlorettes and damn that bus driver.

I can think of a few others, but they are a bit personal.

Freaky Gothic girl. She was cute but a basket case. Always had thing for me and I let it go on for years. Finally she knocked on my window one night and I let her in. Started doing her thing on me and then stabbed me in the thigh with a Swiss army knife. Took everything I had not to slit her throat with it. Went to the hospital and got lots of stiches.

Man, I remember when the crazy ones were the most fun.

 

[ZX9RCAM]

Man, I remember when the crazy ones were the most fun.

Absolutely!

 

[CrazedJava]

Man, I remember when the crazy ones were the most fun.

Can't ever remember dating a girl so hot I'd let her stab me with a knife though.

I mean, the potential was there for a couple of them, but it was never a sure thing.

 

[Governors20]

The worst thing I woke up with was Pancreatitis. If you don't know what this is, trust me when I say it sucks, and going through the Morphine withdrawal after 6 days in the hospital is icing on the cake.

 

[Texasgordo]

I got food poisoning one afternoon and the mud butt got me in my sleep. I woke up to a big stinky wet spot, ended up throwing out the sheets and mattress. I never wanted canned tuna again.

 

[Rattler60]

The worst thing I woke up with was Pancreatitis. If you don't know what this is, trust me when I say it sucks, and going through the Morphine withdrawal after 6 days in the hospital is icing on the cake.

Spent a month and a half in intensive care with pancreatitis. They gave me a 50/50 chance of survival. Women who have given birth naturally and have had pancreatitis say they would prefer the pain of birth over pancreatitis anyday. I would pray for the clock to hurry up so I could press that morphine pump for a tinge of relief from the excruciating pain.

Sent from my VS980 4G using Tapatalk

 

[Charlie]

Getting a call from my then 24 yr. old daughter saying she had rolled her vehicle on I-10 in Comfort! She was OK.

 

[Jakashh]

I got food poisoning one afternoon and the mud butt got me in my sleep. I woke up to a big stinky wet spot, ended up throwing out the sheets and mattress. I never wanted canned tuna again.

that happened to me in Pakistan actually, sooo.... surprisingly the sheets somehow were spotless...