Women are from Mars...

[msharley]

 

[Coyote9]

"Big little short or tall God knows I love them all" and I fail to understand them in three languages!

 

[candcallen]

I was gonna respond but my wife has been busy yelling at me about something I did years before I met her. Cause feelings, I guess

ETA as I was doing dishes after I cooked dinner. Which I should, she says cause she worked all day.

Maybe it all went south when I asked "you know what would happen if a man said that to a woman?

 

[skfullgun]

You dumbass!

 

[candcallen]

You dumbass!

They're insidious in how they seem almost normal, sucking you in till they strike.

 

[skfullgun]

They're insidious in how they seem almost normal, sucking you in till they strike.

It's the nature of the beast! They can't help it!
And WE can't help it!
I once had an old respected friend tell me that if it was not for that "thing" between their legs, there would be a woman hanging from every telephone pole between Houston and San Antonio.

 

[jrbfishn]

Worth watching. Much truth in what he says.


Sent by an idjit coffeeholic from my SM-G892A using Tapatalk

 

[1911'S 4 Me]

I don't have one now. Sometimes I am glad, other times bored.

 

[bbbass]

View attachment 282247

 

[Catherine1]

This topic may have been discussed elsewhere. Mods, please feel free to merge if needed.

Women are from Mars, or is it Venus? I never can remember the title of that book.

Here's my example from this morning:

I go to the local 7-Eleven (I'm in town visiting the g/f) to get an iced coffee. She goes in with me.
Me, being the OCB (Original Cheap Bastard), I grab the big styro cup instead of the smaller clear, plastic one and start to fill the cup from the cold-brew machine. I don't add any ice because my plan is to go home and put ice from her ice-maker in my bubba cup and pour half of the coffee over it for today. I'll save the other half for tomorrow morning..
As I'm filling the cup, she asks, "aren't you going to add any ice?"
I explain my plan for adding ice when we get back to her house and making the coffee last for two mornings.
About that time, the automatic pump that circulates water through the drip tray under the soda fountain right next to the cold-brew machine starts to run.
I'm focused on putting a lid on the styro cup of my freshly poured cold-brew. Without gesturing or providing context, she asks, "Is that warm?"
I point to the sign on top of the machine, "Cold-Brew", and say, "no, it's cold!"
Now she points to the water running through the drip tray and says, with attitude, "I'm talking about that water!"
Evidently, I'm supposed to know what she's thinking.

LOL Good one!

I never read that psycho babble book about women and men but your story really IS a funny story. Thanks for sharing.

Cate
PS: I would have made coffee at home. I bet that your home made coffee from home (Her home or your home.) would taste better too!

I would have used the ICE from home which you were going to do too.

 

[Catherine1]

I'm currently trying to teach my 5 1/2 year old daughter about communication. I'm trying to teach her that just because I understand the words coming out of her mouth, does not mean I understand what she's trying to tell me.

LOL

OMG! I just choked on my hot tea here.

Good one!

Cate

 

[Catherine1]

My wife was ranting last night about me not listening to her and a bunch of other stuff I didn't pay any attention to.

True story: Was asleep in bed and I woke up hearing a large flock of geese flying over. I woke up my wife because I thought that was pretty cool to hear them honking that loud. She said, "You can hear geese flying over at 10,000 feet, but you can't hear me when I stand in the same room and tell you to take out the garbage?" I looked at her and said, "In my defense, the geese don't feel like they have to honk at me every day."

Dang! LOL

Cate

 

[Wolfwood]

that cold brew stuff is good.
the wife said we should make our own instead of buying the jugs of "concentrate" that i kill in two sittings. stuff gets pricier than ammo.

the slower you pour the water in the better it is in my opinion, so i setup a sep funnel on a stand and drip ice water in via stopcock for a few hours, over the coffee into a container in an ice bath, transfer that to the fridge and consume or store in a new container the next day.

kind of off topic i guess, because i didnt get in trouble for setting up lab equipment in the living room. maybe because i gave her some of the finished product before she saw the rig...

 

[dsgrey]

It only gets worse. I've been married for 35 years and we could be talking about the grass then a partial sentence comes out of her mouth with the word he/she. I'm suppose to know what was spinning in her mind cause it ain't about the grass and then she gets upset when I ask but also want to know who he/she is. I'm suppose to know she changed thoughts, was thinking about a grandkid (we have 3) and I'm suppose to automatically know which one.

Then if we agree to eat somewhere earlier and it's mentioned 3 times, 2 hours later when she asks where we are eating I'm in trouble if (1) my tone implies we've had this conversation or even worse (2) I mention we decided 2 hours ago and this is the 4th time I'm repeating.

But let her get together with her two sisters who escalate volume and talk at the same time...no issue. How do you understand two conversations at once PLUS remember? Especially when one of them sounds like she's screeching.

While you will be blamed for having selective hearing (I am good about blocking out background noise when focusing on something), do not EVER repeat that same statement back to her. It's as useful as telling an upset woman to "calm down".

I'm a happily married man but I'm still learning the nuances of this person I married.

 

[DoubleDuty]

It only gets worse. I've been married for 35 years and we could be talking about the grass then a partial sentence comes out of her mouth with the word he/she. I'm suppose to know what was spinning in her mind cause it ain't about the grass and then she gets upset when I ask but also want to know who he/she is. I'm suppose to know she changed thoughts, was thinking about a grandkid (we have 3) and I'm suppose to automatically know which one.

Then if we agree to eat somewhere earlier and it's mentioned 3 times, 2 hours later when she asks where we are eating I'm in trouble if (1) my tone implies we've had this conversation or even worse (2) I mention we decided 2 hours ago and this is the 4th time I'm repeating.

But let her get together with her two sisters who escalate volume and talk at the same time...no issue. How do you understand two conversations at once PLUS remember? Especially when one of them sounds like she's screeching.

While you will be blamed for having selective hearing (I am good about blocking out background noise when focusing on something), do not EVER repeat that same statement back to her. It's as useful as telling an upset woman to "calm down".

I'm a happily married man but I'm still learning the nuances of this person I married.

I feel ya

 

[m5215]

I think my last girlfriend read the book "Women are from Heaven, Men are from Hell". As you can imagine, that relationship did not work out.

 

[skfullgun]

I make my own coffee at home - we live separately. At home, I make a pot every few days and put it in the fridge. The equivalent of two cups, a bit of heavy cream, and two Splendas is my usual concoction - over ice in the summer and heated in the winter.

The g/f usually comes to my place, spends a week to 10 days, and then goes back to her place in the big city. She LOVES being close to all the stores and I'm 14 miles from the nearest Dollar General or gas station.

I will go and visit her at her home, but about 2 to 3 days is all I can take of that Hell-hole. She doesn't cook and doesn't drink coffee, so I'm stuck with venturing out for coffee on the mornings I'm at her place!

 

[justmax]

I make my own coffee at home - we live separately. At home, I make a pot every few days and put it in the fridge. The equivalent of two cups, a bit of heavy cream, and two Splendas is my usual concoction - over ice in the summer and heated in the winter.

The g/f usually comes to my place, spends a week to 10 days, and then goes back to her place in the big city. She LOVES being close to all the stores and I'm 14 miles from the nearest Dollar General or gas station.

I will go and visit her at her home, but about 2 to 3 days is all I can take of that Hell-hole. She doesn't cook and doesn't drink coffee, so I'm stuck with venturing out for coffee on the mornings I'm at her place!

I think you should buy her a coffee maker, a can of coffee. You can always sneak the Splenda in a few packets at a time. What is the next occasion for y'all?

 

[skfullgun]

I think you should buy her a coffee maker, a can of coffee. You can always sneak the Splenda in a few packets at a time. What is the next occasion for y'all?

Why would I need to sneak the Splenda in a few packets at a time?
If by "occasion", you mean special event, her birthday is in November.
I'm pretty sure me buying her a coffee- maker for her birthday would go over about like a turd in the punch bowl at a party!

She doesn't drink coffee, or any alcohol. Just real Dr. Pepper. So, obviously, I'm the life of the party!!!

 

[justmax]

Why what I need to sneak the Splenda in a few packets at a time?
If by "occasion", you mean special event, her birthday is in November.
I'm pretty sure me buying her a coffee- maker for her birthday would go over about like a turd in the punch bowl at a party!

She doesn't drink coffee, or any alcohol. Just real Dr. Pepper. So, obviously, I'm the life of the party!!!

A November birthday would work. Wrap it all up as a gift and explain how would help make it easier to service your needs.You could even offer to help her read the instructions. Just please remember to film her reaction so I can enjoy the moment as well.